Merging the Divine Feminine with the Divine Masculine
Tantra is an ancient, esoteric, Eastern-based belief system that originated in India and dates back thousands of years B.C. Hinduism and Buddhism feature Tantric writings and ideologies, as well as such Tantric practices as Yoga, meditation, visualisation, ritual, transformative touch and spiritual sex. Tantra, a Sanskrit word, has been interpreted to mean ‘a loom’ or ‘to weave’. Such definitions speak to the fundamental Tantric concept of continuity between an individual’s energy and the universal energy.
As Tantra has gained popularity in the west, its interpretation and expression have evolved. Often touted as Neo-Tantra or New Age Tantra, the focus in the west has largely been on Tantra’s principle of spiritual sexuality as a way for couples to bring more meaning and pleasure to lovemaking.
While some religions regard sex as sinful, Tantra is a spiritual system that’s sees sex as sacred. In fact, the act of sex is worshipped as a path to the divine.
During Tantric sex, lovers harness sexual energy to merge not only with each other’s bodies and beings, but also with the divine cosmic consciousness. In so doing, they reach a state of ecstasy that is a sacred experience!
Wherever there is worship, there is ritualistic practice and rituals are often performed by Tantrists. Balancing the body’s chakras or energy centres, meditation, breath control and synchronicity, intimacy rituals, erotic exploration and climax control are some practices adopted.
In Tantra, sexual union merges the masculine and feminine forces in the universe by bringing together Shiva, the Hindu god, and Shakti, the Hindu goddess. When the separate energies of these entities unite, they assume wholeness and commune with the cosmic consciousness. In the same way, when a mortal man and woman come together sexually, they become one with each other and the cosmos.
Because Tantric sex worships and pleasures the feminine as much as the masculine, it has helped many women achieve harmonious sex lives. The unique and egalitarian sexual union experienced during Tantric sex leaves lovers with profound respect, understanding and enjoyment for each other, thereby strengthening the integrity of intimate relationships.
During traditional lovemaking, most couples are focused on the goal – orgasm and ejaculation. Foreplay is optional and distinct from ‘actual sex’, with the objective to reach climax, often as quickly as possible: Hence the ‘quickie’.
Tantrists think differently. Instead of focusing on the end of sex, Tantric lovers relish the entire erotic experience and bask in extended lovemaking. During Tantric sex, every moment of the sexual encounter is considered orgasmic. A kiss, a caress, a thrust, a loving gaze, even a sensual whisper are as meaningful – and as pleasurable – as the final sexual release. Tantric lovers live in the moment and Tantric sex is as prolonged as it is passionate.
living with freedom… rejoice in everything, reject nothing
It is time we saw sex as being the truly sacred act that it is: A deep meditation… a dance of the forces of creation. Sex is a vital force, to be understood and embraced; yet in so many of our cultures we don’t deal with it, we run from it, feel trapped in it, frustrated by it or lack of it. Personal freedom is truly plunging into every feeling and desire of every moment – rejecting nothing as long as we do no harm, this is Tantra.
There is a beautiful source of energy waiting to be trapped between two people; it is the energy of creation. Tantra embraces everything, rejecting nothing and sexual orientation is no exception. Yes, it embraces gay and celibate lifestyles too.
There is much teaching around the transmutation of energy. Sexual energy transmutes on its own, it is intelligent and knows where to go – sexual energy will move through the body – if not blocked by guilt or limiting beliefs – and that is when we experience physical, emotional, mental and spiritual transmutation – sometimes in the form of a full body orgasm. It can happen while we make love, masturbate or meditate.
Our sexual organs contain a very powerful source of energy; by concentrating on this energy we find it is a dynamic force… it moves. This energy can rejuvenate, purify, heal and strengthen. Making love opens our hearts and our minds. At the base of the spine and in the area of the sacral or sexual chakra we have Kundalini Shakti – with the awakening of the Kundalini, we establish the connection to the Soul of Soul: The agent of self-transformation on the physical, mental, emotional, psychic and spiritual levels.
Kundalini is a Sanskrit term relating to the energy flow that stems from the base of the spine, interacting with each chakra in turn and then coming to full force at the crown. There is a yin/yang aspect to the flow, so the Kundalini is often represented as two intertwined snakes wound round a staff, ancient in origin and, interestingly, the symbol widely used in allopathic medicine. When the twin flow is equal it emerges balanced and complete, enlightenment and the realisation of the highest potential results. When the Kundalini is awakened, it will begin a great change in your life, enabling you to live to your highest potential, awakening insight, creativity and energy. This encompasses a strong sensual sense of the self, with balanced esteem and self-worth; a release of ego and unconditional love of self and others couples with deep spiritual understanding. Kundalini is explained by some as ‘the fire of the Holy Spirit dormant in the human body’. It awakens in purity and climbs up to the Tif’eret (heart), where it becomes light, moving up to the Keter (crown), at which point it is transformed into a full awareness of the divine, or, as some sources put it, the awareness of the sacred presence of God connecting ‘All That Is’.
So many people in a quest to be either ‘moral’ or ‘spiritual’ cut themselves off from their own source of power: The sexual energy of their lower chakras and their sexual organs. Denial of feelings, desires and impulses leads to a rejection of ourselves and our cultures, resulting in more problems than it solves. This is not an effective way of living with freedom.
Sex is more than a natural impulse, it is a scared act, whether in the deeper relationships or a casual joining with persons we hardly know. Joining of bodies creates a special temple through which two energy fields and two auric fields induce a magnetic energy that is shared. It is deeply healing, refreshing and profound.
Ancient tantric sexual practices are often described literally or symbolically, there are two exquisite temples in India which are adorned with thousands of statues in different sexual practices and positions. Many ancient practices involve elaborate preparations which celebrate all of the senses: Foods to taste, flowers to see, incense for smell, bells and instruments for sound and bodies to touch.
The most important aspect of Tantric sex and Tantric living is acceptance and enjoyment of all things which give us pleasure and appreciation of beauty. There is nothing to reject in our sexual relationships, there is beauty and wonder in every moment of our lives.
Sustaining Sexual Energy
Stimulation is so intense for some, particularly men, that they find it difficult to control. Here are a few simple techniques:
1. In your mind’s eye see the energy circulating throughout the entire body, move the energy up your spine and circulate it around your partner’s body and your own body.
2. When in deep penetration with your partner the ‘man’ should move in a circular patter as opposed to a straight in or out pattern to sustain the energy longer, this is more exciting for the other partner and gives them time to catch up with their partner’s level of excitement.
3. This final technique is part of the ‘Chaotic Meditation’, taught by Osho and Bhagwan Rajneesh, a teacher from India.
To Come Or Not To Come
Some teachers’ of Tantra define tantric sex as sex in which you don’t reach an orgasm but meditate deeply together for a long period. This is a beautiful way to make love but not the only way to make love. Tantric sex includes all kinds of sex, come if you wish, or don’t – whatever your heart desires – in the true meaning of Tantra. Live with the freedom of ‘living’ each moment as your heart desires.
Chaotic Meditation by Osho (Directly translated)
This is a meditation in which you have to be awake, aware and conscious. Whatever you do, it remains an observer. Do not miss out.
Breathe as fast as you can, as deeply as possible, bring your total energy but still remain an observer. Observe what is happening as if you were just a spectator, as if it were happening to someone else, as if everything was happening in the body and the consciousness cantered and looking.
This note must continue in all three early stages. And, when everything stops, in the fourth step you have become completely inactive, frozen, then this alertness will come to a stop.
First stage: 10 minutes
Breathe chaotically through the nose, concentrating always on exhalation. The body will take care of the inhalation. Do it with as much speed and strength you can – and then a little more, until literally become the breathing. Use the natural movements of the body to store energy. Feel that something is growing, but do not express it during the first stage.
Second stage: 10 minutes
Explode! Throw out everything you need to express. Go totally mad. Whoop, cry, jump, shake, dance, sing, laugh…. Do not hold back anything, let the whole body express. At first it may also be useful to play a bit. Never allow your mind to interfere with what happens. Be total, be whole-hearted.
Third Stage: 10 minutes
With raised arms, jump up and down shouting the mantra,”Hu, Hu, Hu!“ Feel it coming from the belly, not the throat. Every time you fall on the feet, let the sound hammer deep into the sex centre. Completely exhaust yourself.
Fourth stage: 15 minutes
Stop! Freeze wherever you are, at any posture. Do not change the position of the body at all. A cough, a movement anything will dissipate the energy flow and the effort will be lost. Be a witness of everything that happens to you.
The fifth stage
would be to move into dance or into lovemaking expressing gratitude, celebration and joy.
Note: If where you meditate you cannot make any noise, you can use this silent alternative: Rather than throwing out the sounds, let the catharsis in the second stage express through body movements. In the third stage, the sound ”Hu!” can be hammered silently inside.
The Power of Affirmation on the Path to Freedom
Ideal Lover – Meditation and Affirmation
Sit or lie down so that you are very comfortable.
Take four long deep breaths, as you exhale on each breathe letting everything go.
Do this until you feel comfortably relaxed.
Picture yourself meeting your perfect partner.
Visualise yourself touching this person, feel them.
See yourself with all of the qualities you desire …
Picture yourself making love easily effortlessly and exquisitely.
Affirm something like this… whatever works for you:
“My ideal love has come to me easily and effortlessly.”
“I am open and spontaneously – a perfectly satisfying lover.”
“I am the perfect lover with my perfect lover.”
Take some time to enjoy your fantasy, it will manifest for you and will be for the greater good of all concerned.
Being Alone – Meditation Affirmation
To be alone is to tune into the sacred being of yourself, opening to your inner wisdom, your intuitive mind – your higher self.
Sit comfortably, relax your mind, your body and your entire being.
Choose affirmations that feel good and repeat them with heartfelt emotion.
“I enjoy being alone.”
“Within my solitude, I discover deep understanding.”
“My intuition and inner wisdom are complete, clear and always present.”
“I am open to receiving everything I need to know.”
“I am open to receiving anything I need to have… right here, right now.”
Enjoy your time alone, there are deep teachings in these special moments. Take time to hear your own inner teacher your own intuitive voice.
Trust yourself, respect your own impulses and trust this will lead you to discovering a lifestyle which is suitable for you. So many people are afraid to act on their feelings and feel trapped when they don’t. Don’t be afraid of your feelings even if they seem extreme; within your feelings are your keys to personal freedom.
Do what you have the energy and desire to do; if you follow your feelings you can’t go wrong, even when something may seem extreme at the time. It’s OK to do something extreme, in excess, once in a while – “everything in moderation and that includes some excess (in moderation…) excessive moderation is not freedom.