The Perspective Shift: Conscious Parenting

When one hears the term ‘Conscious Parenting’, it conjures various meanings for each listener. To demystify it a bit, I will share my straightforward understanding of it – then we can get to the good stuff!

Conscious parenting emphasises a mindful and aware approach in guiding our interactions with children. It encourages us as parents to reflect deeply on our own emotions, behaviours, and reactions, recognising that our unresolved issues can affect our parenting. It’s focused on fostering a connection that prioritises authenticity and mutual respect. It allows our children to develop into their true selves, free from imposed expectations or societal norms, while promoting a nurturing environment where both parent and child can grow emotionally and spiritually. That’s it in a nutshell and it is one of the strong pulses in the veins of my daily life.

But now, can I lead you into the deeper realms of my heart as a mom? I will not come to you as a psychological counsellor, master coach, or consciousness teacher. No, not today. For now, I’ll simply put on my mom slippers and invite you to be beside me for a while…

There I was, sitting on a very isolated beach in a little, unknown town where few people come. I went into the depths of my being again. “Just a little while, G,” I say to myself with a grin. “Don’t get lost in it for too long this time!” But oh, how I love going there! I never really come back the same. So, there I am, just being, when the moment overwhelmed me – purely, innocently and gloriously.

I see the vast ocean before me, in all her splendour. It always feels as though she is crashing each wave for me, bringing herself closer to my being, singing songs of ancient memories. She woos me. But then, I hear a child’s laughter roll in with the wind, rustling in my ear and sending ripples of joy down to every part of my seen and unseen essence, touching my hidden insides. I look away from the magnificent ocean, over my shoulder and I see. I see. I see so much in this moment and I am completely overcome. Time stands still and slowly pulls me close in a warm embrace. She etches memories and emotions onto my skin, deeper and deeper. Before my eyes… there’s another magnificent canvas unfolding.

I see them, all four of them… each one in their own little heaven right here, right now – in this Kairos time of divine bliss. One is sitting on a sand dune, drinking in the precious moment and thinking about whatever a pubescent teenager wants to think about, I suppose. But she is the dawn itself. She is the one who opened the first door in my heart 14 years ago. She touches the light with her eyes and her smile reflects it back to those around her. She is solid, quiet and ever steady. And she loves horses. Aaaah, she is probably thinking about that! But I see her, fully, in all her radiance.

Over there, kicking a rugby ball, is a pillar of strength with red curly hair (which he is obsessed with, we should respectfully note – cue teenager vibes). He was born only 12 years ago, yet his soul carries ancient stories and energies. He is wise, too wise. He is strong, too strong… yet so utterly witty and fun! But his heart is too soft for a cruel world and I weep for that many a day. I see him, I see him.

My Lu is pure sunshine. I see her, dancing in front of the ocean, singing a song I can’t hear. But the ocean does. The ocean listens to her intently and dances with her, as though she herself, Mama Ocean, is mesmerised by Lu and her shine. They dance as one, each in their own way, making songs about dreams and hopes, about visions and missions. She is the full spectrum of colour, this feisty, sensitive one. She carries the world at the tender age of 10. And often, I want to help her carry that load… but I can’t. I see her. I simply see her in her wonderment.

My rainbow boy over there, a compilation of various hues and grace, of heart and depth… he runs. Oh, how he loves to run! He is a cloud chaser, a wind maker. He sees the world through untouched visions and his eyes sparkle with Spirit’s greatness. He lights up this world. He guides and weaves with unseen things just by living fully. He is soft, yet strong beyond imagination. He has saved me many times – at only seven years of age. Too many times to mention, but he did so without even knowing it. I see him and drink him in like drops of dew.

In this instant, these four columns of light play in my vision field on the tapestry of Pachamama’s greatness. I have no words. Only feelings that overcome me. And that, to me, is conscious parenting. It is the interwoven galaxies of spirits and souls walking on this earth as parents and children – children who may one day be parents themselves. Honouring cycles and seasons with their own beings. We are all one, we are all connected and to think that we are separate creates such an absurd and painful inner death in the soul. Within the illusion of detachment and separation, we find ourselves with labels and expectations. All neatly boxed. I am the parent. You are the child. I know. You don’t. I will teach you. You. Me.

Those columns of light came to me from the stars themselves and I profoundly sense that daily. They are not just my children; they are cosmic firmament particles settling into the earthly realm – each one a unique expression of stardust and God. They come to us more sensitive, more in tune with the universe; they come to us as gifts and guides towards a future that we will never be able to see with these physical, optical-illusion eyes.

Then I ask you humbly, who are we to think that we can mould and shape them? Who are we to think that we know better than they do for themselves? Who are we to impose our own limited beliefs and our own fears onto them? Who are we to dim the light in their eyes?

That is the crucible of conscious parenting: seeing them for who they are, honouring that and guiding them when needed – but only when truly needed. There is such a delicate balance between telling them what to do and allowing them to be their authentic selves.

But G, you may ask, “How? This sounds a bit airy-fairy, a bit mystical.” Well, I live in the world of mysticism and I dream of a world where more of us do! For the magic is found there, more often than not, in plain sight for us to find – a galactical treasure hunt, we may say! Mystical parenting… maybe I should call it that!

The key for me lies within the heart. When we start on our own path of conscious living, we begin to purge the dust and debris within our hearts. We may tear down the walls we’ve built around it. Walls with names such as conditioning, fear, beliefs, past wounds – or simply, as I like to call it, the matrix. It is often an excruciating endeavour to begin with, but it is also gloriously beautiful in its unravelling! Meanwhile, our children are born with their hearts still utterly open and connected to the mystical source of being-ness. They simply need guidance, support and love. We can teach them how to connect to that heart source, of course, and how to live from their inner self, from wisdom and from intuition. That, dear soul, is where the true power lies: Within THEM. But for us to be able to guide, support and love them fully, we need to enter the daunting gauntlet of living from the heart space ourselves. As we elevate our consciousness, we elevate our parenting automatically. As we live more and more from the heart, we give them permission, unconsciously, to do the same. As we stand up for who we are and live in our authentic self-expression, we show them it is possible. Open your hearts to them and see them as they are, not as you want them to be. Simply as they are. Honour their beings, their light and the stories they carry within. But do so with yourself first. Open your heart to yourself and let the light in.

Our children don’t need fancy schools or toys – they need presence, unconditional love and acceptance. They need a safe space where they can feel everything and live through everything that life throws at them, so that they can one day face it on their own, with courage and an inner connection to their higher self. That inner connection then becomes the bridge between their hearts and their minds, between themselves and the systems at large. Let their intuition guide them and honour their deeper knowing. It builds trust within themselves, towards themselves. We are merely guides for a little while, but we must guide with our heart’s eyes wide open. It will be painful some days, but growing pains serve a purpose. Watch them make mistakes; don’t fix it for them! Just be with them in the thick of it, as a witness. And should they ask… then you can maybe guide them. The best way, though, is with clever questioning and reflection. They walk alongside us, not behind us. They are often our teachers more than we are theirs. They birth parts of us that no one else can birth.

Yes, there are many techniques and ways of uncovering this connection with regards to parenting. But not now, not today.

For today, these words will suffice, dear reader. For it is the mystical beginning of it all. And that is what I want to leave you with.
May we love them deeply, without interference.
May we see them truthfully, with our heart’s eyes.
May we honour their lights reverently, for they will be the custodians one day.
So may we, yes, may we… just one moment of splendour at a time.

Namaste,
G

Gérraine Rosenkrantz is a seasoned NLP, EFT, mBIT Master Coach, with a BA (Hons.) Psych. Counselling degree, Gérraine brings all her experience into her daily life and surroundings with vigour! She lives fully and believes anyone can create their dream life, interwoven with grace, wisdom, love and joy. She touches hearts and lives through her writing, by hosting various workshops and with public speaking engagements. Her passion towards conscious parenting is founded on her love of working with relationships holistically, honouring it as a living ecosystem of flow. Beyond her professional pursuits, Gérraine is just a homeschooling mom of 4 gorgeous souls, a passionate writer, weaving mystical insights into everyday life to inspire transformation. For her, life is a daily practice of infusing spiritual awareness into every moment, with as much fun as possible. She finds immense joy in exploring the world with her adventurous spirit, as she believes that each experience is there to enrich our understanding of ourselves and the universe.