Finding Your Sanctuary
I find it interesting that the term ’retreat’ has become part of our everyday conversation, almost to the point of trendiness and, with such an array of options, from Yoga retreats to mindfulness escapes to silent sanctuaries, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed by our choices. But what binds these experiences together?
At its essence, a retreat is about creating a unique, designated space and taking time away from the daily grind. It isn’t just a vacation; it’s an intentional break to focus on personal goals and desires.
When I think of a fantastic wellness retreat, my mind wanders to paradisiacal settings like the Maldives, ideally shared with a close friend or loved one. However, my most recent mental wellness retreat was more grounded – literally and figuratively. I ventured to Ballito for a transformative experience with a master practitioner in Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP).
If you’re not familiar with it, NLP is all about understanding how our thoughts, language and behaviours are connected, helping us to change unhelpful patterns and beliefs. It’s like unravelling a tangled ball of yarn to find clarity and fresh perspectives, which is perfect for anyone looking to boost their mental wellness!
While it might not possess the exotic allure of a week-long Yoga retreat in Bali, I can confidently say that the experience worked wonders. I left Ballito feeling re-energised, focused and joyful – a reminder of the profound effects a well-structured retreat can have.
You don’t need to embark on an expensive getaway to find rejuvenation, either. Take, for instance, Mayim Bialik, acclaimed actress, neuroscientist and mental health advocate, who opted for a two-week digital detox at home. In that time, she developed a clearer communication strategy for her family, all without the interference and imposition of screens. It’s incredible what we can achieve when we step back.
The challenge of self-care
Admittedly, it’s easier to unplug when you’re physically away from your everyday environment, especially if you struggle with the self-discipline required to resist distractions at home. Recently, I’ve committed to a gym routine under the guidance of a coach, working out at least three times a week.
Initially, I would bring my phone with me – to stay connected, of course. Now, it remains at home and that hour has become my personal retreat, an invaluable space dedicated solely to me.
As a busy parent balancing the demands of running a business and juggling speaking engagements, I cherish this time. We live in a world that often leaves us feeling like we are ‘ON’ 24/7, making it hard to switch off, even for a moment. Yet, I’ve found that committing to regular, intentional moments of solitude significantly enhances my wellbeing.
Retreats also provide wonderful opportunities for connection with others. One of my favourite experiences was a weekend writers’ retreat in upstate New York, where I spent time with strangers tapping maple syrup and sharing experiences while writing. Though I haven’t maintained friendships with anyone from that retreat, the shared experience of exploration and expression created lasting memories.
Embracing the retreat mentality
Gone are the days when stepping out of your home meant true disconnection, free from work obligations. Today’s fast-paced world glorifies constant engagement and many of us feel guilty if we don’t respond to messages or emails within moments. It can feel daunting to consider retreating, yet there’s undeniable power in pausing to care for ourselves.
Retreat is not merely about withdrawing from the world; it’s an intentional act of self-care. It allows us to recharge and rejuvenate, enabling us to thrive in all areas of our lives.
True retreat is about consciously stepping away from our daily lives to connect with our inner selves. Unlike vacations which are filled with activities and exploration, retreats centre around introspection and personal growth.
It’s about creating a sacred space for oneself, whether physically or mentally. This space might involve meditation, Yoga, journaling, or simply spending time in nature. It’s creating a sanctuary for our minds and hearts to rest, reflect and rejuvenate.
Recognising when it’s time to retreat
Knowing when to retreat can be just as important as the act itself. As life speeds along, it’s easy to overlook signs of burnout: Persistent fatigue, irritability, or feeling overwhelmed. Being self-aware during significant life transitions, such as career changes or the loss of a loved one, can help us identify when a retreat is especially necessary.
During these times, stepping back gives us the space needed for processing emotions and cultivating resilience.
While reactive retreats can be a remedy for stressful situations, prevention is always better than cure and this can be achieved by proactively incorporating regular retreats into our lives. Scheduled retreats can pre-emptively maintain mental and emotional wellbeing, helping you cope better daily.
Breaking through barriers to retreating
Despite the allure of retreating, many of us struggle with where to begin, often under the guise of time constraints. However, retreat is not a rigid pastime; it should be a flexible practice that can fit individual needs and circumstances.
Retreating can range from structured, organised retreats to personal getaways or even just dedicating half an hour each morning to meditation and regular walks in nature. Getting outdoors has proven therapeutic effects on mental health, reducing stress while enhancing happiness and cognitive function.
Embrace your retreat journey: Ideas to consider
If you’re unsure where to start your retreat journey, consider these options:
- Personal retreats at home
You don’t need to travel far to create a retreat. Designating a weekend at home to disconnect from digital devices and creating a quiet space for meditation or reading can profoundly impact your wellbeing. - Nature retreats
Nature possesses incredible healing abilities. Retreating to natural settings – forests, mountains, lakes – can be a game changer. Engaging with the natural world helps ground us and lift our spirits. - Spiritual or religious retreats
For those who find strength in spirituality, participating in retreats organised by spiritual centres can deepen faith and provide communal support. - Wellness and Yoga retreats
These retreats often incorporate Yoga, meditation, and holistic health practices in serene settings, allowing for a nose-to-tail detox of body and mind. - Creative retreats
Seeking to reignite your passion? Consider retreats focused on writing, art, or music – an opportunity to engage with like-minded individuals while diving deeply into your creative side. - Digital detox retreats
In our screen-saturated society, consider a digital detox retreat to reconnect with yourself and your environment. - Solo travel retreats
Travelling alone offers unique opportunities for self-discovery and independence, encouraging you to explore new places while reflecting on your goals. - Silent retreats
Silent retreats – where participants abstain from speaking for a period – provide a powerful setting for mindfulness and introspection.
Incorporating retreats into daily life
Short, daily retreats like meditation and walking, require intention but longer breaks also necessitate planning. Prioritising self-care and establishing boundaries with work and personal obligations are essential steps in making retreats manageable.
Although time constraints and responsibilities can – and often do – pose challenges, even brief retreats can make all the difference. A day without screens or a weekend in nature can yield meaningful benefits. Approaching these moments with an open heart allows for authentic healing and growth.
By taking the time to retreat, whether through expansive adventures or small moments of solitude, you honour your mental, emotional and physical wellbeing. So, let’s give ourselves that permission. Embrace your retreat and remember, you absolutely deserve it.
Yael Geffen is the CEO and shareholder of Sotheby’s International Realty, South Africa. She grew up in a real estate dynasty established by her grandmother, Aida, and, prior to joining the family business in 2009, she acquired extensive real estate marketing, brand building and business development experience in the United States. Yael is also an accomplished public and motivational speaker and her broadcast experience includes hosting and producing her own radio show from 2013 to 2017. Yael is a sought-after Life and Business Strategy Advisor.
